Nealmeister

Here's the deal (3rd Grade Throwbacks)

Kristyn (who is getting married to Pat), sent along this Scattergories thing that I thought was mildly amusing and just a tad funny.  Kind of like a throw-back to 3rd grade.  The directions say that the whole thing is harder than it looks--and while that was true, I did kind of chuckle the whole way along.  Naughty or Nerdy?  Nipples or Nails?  You're supposed to answer the questions just like scattergories, using your first name.  And if there's one thing I realized, it is this: as much as I used to hate the letter "N" (it always seemed so annoying), I was really grateful for the shits and giggles the letter "N" was giving me.

 

1. What is your name:   Neal
2. 4 letter word:   Neat
3. Vehicle:  Nitro
4. City:  Notingham (UK)
5. Boy Name:  Noah
6. Girl Name:   Natasha
7. Alcoholic drink:  New Old-Fashioned (yummy bitters!)
8. Occupation:  Neurosurgeon
9. Something you wear:  Necktie
10. Celebrity:  Neil Diamond
11. Food:  Nachos
12. Something found in a bathroom: Nail Clippers
13. Reason for being late:  No Cabs at the Cab Stand
14. Cartoon Character:  Nemo
15. Something you shout:  Nice Ass!      

16. Animal:  Nightingale (Technically, a bird)
17. Body part:  Nails
18. Word to describe you:  Nerdy

Errr another one down

They're going down like flies.  I literally just went to bed and woke up.  Damn.  So long, Rudy Giuliani.

Goodbye to You

Well, well, another fallen soldier.  John Edwards says goodbye to his bid for the presidency.  I feel like a little bit of Michelle Branch should be playing in the background; the guitar strumming in the background ("[a]nd it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time").  The word out on the street is that Edwards won't be endorsing either Hillary or Obama any time soon.  I wonder if his endorsement would make much of a dent in what is basically a two-person race for the Democratic nomination... just in time for Super Tuesday!

According to the Nation, in the Florida primary Clinton was at 50 percent. Obama was winning 33 percent. Former North Carolina Senator John Edwards was at 14 percent. And Dennis Kucinich, who is out of the race, pulled 1 percent.  But what I thought was interesting was what lay in those small Florida towns -- J.E. pulled 31% of the vote in those towns.  And even more weird, what J.E. demonstrated was that, with his "of the people" attitude and appeal, he could pull off a strong turnout in rural areas in states where he didn't even campaign.  So, what's to come of states like Oklahoma, Tennessee, Minnesota and those states with vast rural stretches? With J.E. saying aloha, it looks like the heat is off of Clinton in rural areas that aren’t exactly an urban base for Obama.  I like Obama/Edwards, but we'll see... we'll see...

Are you a "Seagull Manager?"

My assistant sent me the 2008 additions to the essential vocab works for the workplace.  Reminds me of a conversation I had with Alan when we were driving up to Madison, Wisconsin.  I just had to post.  I may just forward it, too...

1. BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

2. SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

3. ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard

4. SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

5. CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.

6. PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

7. MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

8. SITCOMs: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What Yuppies get into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.

9. STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

10. SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.

11. XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

12. IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are Annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them.

13. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again. Often feel like doing this to my comput er------

14. ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

15. 404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error Message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested site could not be located.

16. GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, and subdivisions.

17. OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. (Like after hitting send on an email by mistake).

18. WOOFS: Well-Off Older Folks.

I'm just a young, single male (and totally available)

Could the reason why I'm not following lock step with some of my friends and contemporaries is that I'm an unsophisticated bachelor?  Well, the Wall Street Journal's got some words for me.  Actually, I'm a little scared.  Maybe I should go ahead and buy a house, dismiss dreams of being artistic and creative, work even harder, get married and have 3 kids and work even harder, and wake up -- after I forgot I existed for 30 or so years -- to find out I'm 56.

That wasn't a bitter rant, was it?

Read on: "Young Single Male" is Urged to Grow Up" on The Informed Reader Blog brought to us by the folks at Dow Jones and the Wall Street Journal.

The Bitch List

Reason to Bitch #1: I definitely was not planning on staying at work this late.  But whatever, I should be happy I have a job, right?

Reason to Bitch #2: I still can't hold down food.  Uughhh.  I am hungry and tired, and did I mention, yeah, I was at work way longer than I want to be tonight.

Reason to Bitch #3: Weddings. Weddings. And more weddings. Everyone's getting married, and I should be happy, but people, wtf is going on? Everyone's getting married in 2008! There's only so many weekends in a year!

Reason to Bitch #4: I never got to go to New Hampshahhh.  Booo.  Oh, and did I mention, yeah, I was totally at work for 17 hours today.  And I'm tired.  And I'm hungry.

Reason to Bitch $5: Having "a mind conservative and a heart liberal." Unfortunately, that typifies me... and that person... word.

"Nevar" Hate in 2K8!

• The first thing I want to say about 2008 on my blog: I love Chicago.
• An affirmative action I want to contemplate beginning in 2008: Rule 705 Motions or ... .
• Some things continue to sit well in 2008: for sure, Harry Potter movies.
• Nicknames that shouldn't (and can't) stick in 2008 in 2008: Carlton; Carlton; Carlton.
• Overrated for 2008: Showering, productivity, lack of McDonalds.
• First wrong reference/realisation of 2008: "it's what i eat and what i do".
• Magic number of 2008: 2050.
• Looking forward to in 2008: Becker's Litany of Saints @ Easter Vigil; 7/26; joy; 27.